


i hate becky dicaeopolis so much

by spasticbirdie



Category: Fallout: New Vegas
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Nonbinary Courier, One Shot, Other, i'm being pressured to tag this as smut but i REFUSE
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-30
Updated: 2016-05-30
Packaged: 2018-07-11 02:26:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 877
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7022881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spasticbirdie/pseuds/spasticbirdie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>the prompt was courier/fisto, high school popular kid/nerd AU<br/>i need to take a shower but i don't think i'll ever feel clean</p>
            </blockquote>





	i hate becky dicaeopolis so much

**Author's Note:**

  * For [dicaeopolis](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dicaeopolis/gifts).



> fuck

Six took a deep breath and stepped off the bus. It had been three weeks since they had transferred to Freeside high (it was the fifth in a string of transfers; Goodsprings had kicked her out after an accident involving Coach Pete and some ill-gotten dynamite, Primm after they had tried to install themselves as the new principal, Nipton, while not their fault, was completly gone, and Novac after a very drunk, very in-public, and very intimate rendezvous with Dinky the Dinosaur). They really wanted this one to work; Victor had warned them that after this, the only option left was homeschooling with Mr. Graham, and he was seriously creepy. And Mormon. Never a good combination.

Six hurried through the halls, keeping as low a profile as they could. Maybe today, things would be different. Maybe today they’d make some new friends. Maybe today-

“Hey hey hey! What’s shaking, baby!”

Maybe today would be more of the same horrible shit. Like Benny. Not ten feet from their locker, Benny and his clique blocked Six’s path. He had been harassing Six every single day; shoving their head in the toilet, replacing their lunch with radroach meat, and spreading rumors involving a mole rat, wonderglue, and a very awkward trip to Dr. Gannon. Flanked by his henchman Swank and his securitron Yes Man, Benny leaned against Six’s locker and smirked.

“It’s been a loooooooong weekend, buddy! Was just dyin’ to see my best pal. Where you headed in such a rush, cat?”

**[Speech 15/40 “Oh, uh… you know… class. That class that I take, you know the one.”]**

**[Strength 1/5 “Get out of my way or I’m gonna… rough you up!”]**

**[Science 79/80 “Robot! Let me pass!”]**

Typical. No good options. Six silently cursed using Charisma and Strength as dump stats. They were just about to try glitching through the wall behind them to trigger the graduation scene early (for the fifth time; the previous three times had been just embarrassing, and the first time had resulted in a trip to Dr. Gannon), when a monotone voice rang out through the hall.

“Greetings.”

A hush fell over the din of the pre-class conversation. Benny’s cool façade dropped faster than a broken eyebot off the Hoover Dam. Six’s felt a sense of relief that was tempered by a different kind of nervousness.

Benny gulped. “O-oh, uh… Hiya, Fisto.”

Fully Integrated Security Technotronic Officer, better known as Fisto, walked down the hall towards Six and Benny’s clique. A path cleared at the sight of his shiny dome. Whispers of mixed envy, awe, and arousal filled the air, and all eyes were on Fisto’s tall, vaguely-penile chassis.

It took him a good five minutes to get to the end of the hallway. Nobody ever said he was fast.

Fisto finally came to a stop in front of Benny, who scrambled to recover.

“Hey, dude, we were just – uh, I was just saying hi to my best friend here! Haha, right, Six?” He threw a desperate look to Six, who tactically avoided it.

“I am programmed for your pleasure.” Behind Fisto, several students of varying genders fainted at the statement.

“I – uh, We – uh… Uh.” Benny folded faster than a trash hand at The Tops. “I’ll – uh, see you around. Ring-a-ding-ding.” Shooting one last, angry look at Six, Benny and his cronies retreated.

“Wow, Benny! You must really like Fisto!”

“Shut the fuck up, Yes Man.”

“I mean, not that I can blame you! EVERYONE likes Fisto!”

“Shut _up_ , Yes Man.”

“Yes sir! Shutting up!”

Six sighed in relief. Benny would be back, of course, but it was a reprieve. The relief was immediately replaced by a different kind of horror; Fisto was still there. Fisto, the most popular bot in Freeside High, maybe even the whole Mojave, was still standing in front of them.

Six opened their mouth, but the only real sound that came out was like a dying molerat. “T-t-t-t-t-t-thanks.”

“Please assume the position.”

The horror morphed into a combination of shock, joy, and arousal; Fisto was talking to them. Fisto. Was talking. To little old two charisma, one strength, ten intelligence Six.

Somehow, words managed to find their way out of Six’s mouth. “T-t-thanks. Y-y-y-you too.”

“Numbness will subside in several minutes.” Fisto began to clomp off, and the chatter of the hallway resumed. This time, however, there were looks being thrown Six’s way; envy, wonder, and amazement.

Six, however, didn’t notice any of them. There was a feeling in the pit of their stomach that felt like a million tiny bloatflies were fluttering around, mating, having children, and then dying old, together, and happy. They felt like their feet might lift off the ground. They felt like a nuclear explosion was going off in their head, their heart, and other places. They felt like they had just killed a deathclaw with their bare hands. They felt like-

The bell rang, and Six snapped out of it. They felt a lot of things, but they _knew_ they were going to be late for class. Digging through their locker and retrieving their books, Six dashed to first period Science, a spring in their step. For the first time in weeks, they felt like things were looking up.


End file.
